Kiss Me, Stupid!

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

*Later that evening Kim tries working on her book but gets interrupted constantly by the loud noise coming from next door. She sighs heavily and throws down her pen. In her jammies (the cute ones this time, lol) she storms out of the house and down the sidewalk to Dean's house. Mitch, Frankie and Clark are still there partying it up. Kim bangs on the door, annoyed. No one answers. She keeps pounding until Clark answers. With her hands on her hips, Kim stands in front of him and taps her foot*

Kim: Do you know what time it is?

Clark: Time for you to join us!

*He pulls her in by the arm. She goes spinning into the crowd of celebrities. Nervous and angry at the same time she tries to find her way to the exit but she gets pulled by the arm and goes flying on the couch, sitting down. She looks to the man who pulled her down*

Kim: What are you doing here?!

Gary: Thought I'd save ya'.....Terrible party, isn't it?

*Kim laughs and shakes her head*

Kim: Absolutely terrible. Why are you here?

Gary: Jimmy invited me.

Kim: Jimmy?!

*Gary chuckles*

Gary: Yup.

*Kim looks to the fake camera blankly*

Kim: Was I expecting more of a detailed answer?

[funnydrunkygal]

Oh gee whiz, Kimmy! That was a great one! See,I KNEW you could do it!!!!!!!!

Meanwhile,

Dean and Lynn had 'finished' up.... LOL...

And now they were walking along the desert highway, Dean grabs Lynn by the arm and points.

Dean: LYNNN! Look!

Lynn looks around, then spots the city ahead.

Lynn: OOOOO! It's LA! We're back!

Lynn screams with glee and jumps into Dean's arms for a big smooch.

Dean: We made spledid time, my dahhlin....

Dean twirls Lynn around, and kisses her romanticaly.....

Lynn soon figures out after the kiss that she has fallen in love with Dean, and she's worried, he's a married man.

Lynn: I'm glad we broke down out here, it was a adventure, Dean. And I thought it was great fun, baby.

Dean: And I ain't lettin ya out of my sight! I really like you, gal. And you ain't getting away!

Lynn punches Dean's arm playfully.

Lynn: Maybe my maid took care of Fluffay....

They both crack up, stick their heads in the air and head off tworad Dean's house, laughing all the way.


Meanwhile,

The doorbell rings at Dean's house, and Clark goes to open the door, and the friends of Dean and Lynn go wild when they see them, Dean and Lynn jump up onto a chandlier, and Lynn hangs onto Dean's legs....

[LadyKnight]

Have no fear, Paula is here!
Just give me a moment to get into the story ladies. I'll join ya!

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

*Kim looks up when she hears the screaming and clanking of glass*

Kim: Oh no!

*Once she spots Dean and Lynn she quickly runs toward the door.*

Gary: Where are ya' going?

Kim: I can't stay here! Once Lynn finds me she'll never let this down!

*Kim runs to the door but Lynn spots her and drops from the chandlier*

Lynn: Pally!

*Kims eyes grow wider as she reaches the door and swings it open. Clark slams it shut and picks Kim up, placing her to the left, next to Lynn*

Kim: I...um...I--

[funnydrunkygal]

YAY PAULA IS HERE! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

*Climbs up walls crazily and screams like a comanche*

Lynn jumps into Kimmy's arms and pinches her cheeks.

Lynn: HEY PALLY-WALLY KIMMY-WIMMY! How ya doin'?

Lynn jumps outta Kim's arms and grabs some weird lady's drink and places it in Kim's hands.

Lynn: Now you're gonna SWING!

All the sudden, Dean and Mitch apeer and they both grab Lynn and twirl her around the houe, while Frankie and Clark join in. After a few minutes they all fall down and roll around crazily.

Lynn and Dean hop up and Dean rips off Lynn's skirt.

Lynn: Whheeeeee! I didn't like that thang anyway, Dean!

Dean: Baby, you look great on the outside and inside!

Dean gives her that look again, and Lynn turns to mush.

Dean: I love you baby.

Lynn: Love you too, and I always will.

Lynn gets that feeling of dread again of the coming days when their love will grow. What about Dean's wife and family? Oh well. Dean and Lynn can make it.

Paula jumps up outta Mitch's grasp and grabs a curtin cord and swings around the room.

Paula: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

*Gary walks out and never comes back*

Thanks Lynn....thanks.

[funnydrunkygal]

*Rolls crazily on the floor, screams, and Gary races back in*

Gary: KIM?!

Lynn locks all doors and hides keys in her garters, looks at Gary happily.

Lynn: Now try and get em' pally.

Dean races over to Lynn and puts his hands on her shoulders, rubbing them soothigly.

Dean: Don't worry sweetheart, we're all friends here, and this is my house and nobody is leaving!

Music starts to play and people start chanting 'We want Lynn!'. Lynn shakes her head and laughs, she winks cutely at Dean and walks up the small stairs to the little stage. She twirls once in her sparkly red dress, her hair billowing around her.

She catches Dean looking lovengly at her.

'Not again,' thinks Lynn, 'Everytime he looks at me like that I melt into little peices.'

Dean meanwhile has thoughts of Lynn too, as he watches her bow and make small talk with the guests, he thinks:

'I didn't think I'd ever stop loving Jeanne, but I have. And this is the only girl I've ever loved. I need to get her, somehow...'

The star-in-love's thoughts are interuppted when the redheaded beauty starts to sing.

Lynn, all the while looks into Dean's eyes.

"See the pyramids along the Nile... Watch the sunrise on a tropic isle...."

Lynn holds back tears as she sings, but just looking at Dean, the man she loves, the married man and father, makes her sob all over again. She clears her throat and contiues the song...

"Just remember darlin', all the while
You belong to me

See the market place in old Algiers
Send me photographs and souvenirs
Just remember when a dream appears
You belong to me

I'll be so alone without you
Maybe you'll be lonesome too and blue

Fly the ocean in a silver plane
See the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember til you're home again
You belong to me

Fly the ocean in a silver plane
See the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember til you're home again
You belong to me...."

Lynn finishs the song, but starts to sob uncontorlbally, she rushes off the stage and down the hall, into Dino's bedroom. She jumps into his bed and buries her face into his pillows, inhaling the wonderful scent of 'Woodhue'.

Lynn had grown to love Dean over the past 20 years,when in 1944, Lynn was a Flamenco dance/ciggrette girl meeting Dean in AC and they fell in love the very night they met and many a time Dean asked Lynn to marry him but Lynn was afraid about Dean's family, and married Dean's stunt man, which didn't last. The affair btween Lynn and Dean had lasted all through those 20 years.

All the sudden, Dean is at Lynn's side, his strong arms around her, cradling her.

Dean: Lynn, baby, what's the matter, huh? Hmmm?

Lynn looks up, into his eys. She knew he was in love with her still, and she was wrong not for marrying him back in 44'. What was the matter with me? She thought.

Lynn: Oh, Dean. I'm so sorry for what I've done to you. It's all my fault, I was afraid Dean, afraid for your wife, and kids. And your sanity! Imagine, you would be ruined if we had married then! I was thinking only for myself though,and I didn't know it at the time.But I love you Dean and I always will, and if you still want me, I'm here.

Dean brings her close to him and holds her tight, kissing her neck, massiging her back at the same time.

Dean: Lynn, I've been waiting so long to hear you say that. I've been hurting for, everyday thinking about you, Lynn. I've never loved any woman as much as I love you. It's not your fault, something happend, that's all. I still love you, more than anything. I don't care if my career is ruied, or 'Kiss Me Stupid' doesn't get made. I want you, Lynn. And I'm asking you to be my wife.

Lynn sits up in bed, looking deep into Dean's eyes. She knows what she will say, direct from her heart, just like what Dean said came from his heart.

Lynn: Of course I will be your wife! Forever, and always....


Now girls, you figure what happens next! And this is in real life, no movie here.

[butterscotchgreer]

not too sappy for me pally, but im crying all over the keyboard. heehee!

kim races into gary's arms aas he picks her up with excitement.

kim: no! i will not stand for this...you....you walked out on me!*she pulls away from his chest*

gary: but kim, as soon as i walked out that door, i was grieving...just grieving huney! *he pulls her back in*

kim looks to lynn for support , but she is in her own little world with dean

theresa walks to suprise them after years of not seeing her.

theresa: kim! lynn!

they are too involved with their sweethearts to notice her.

theresa: heeellllllooooooo!

finally they turn around and see her with a smirk.

lynn and kim: *gasp*

kynn: i cant believe this!

kim: neither can i!*with a smile*

they both run towards her for a group hug


okay girs, if i have ruined what you were going to say just tell me and ill delete it. but if you like it tell me.

[funnydrunkygal]

NO! GO AWAY! Nah, I'm kidding! You did great, that was really cute! GREAT JOB PALLY!

Lynn rolls her eyes and Dean gives Kim and Theresa a look that could kill, he gets up off the bed and pulls Lynn up with him.

Lynn breaks the ice.

Lynn: We're gettin' married! Finally after 20 years of loving eachother, we're getting married!

(I changed the date Dean and I met to 1944 from 1954, so it would be more romantic!)

Dean flashes his gal a smile as big as the sun and slaps her butt playfully.

Dean: Ain't that great?! I've loved this girl forever, and the dream has come true.

The two love birds laugh and skip arm and arm out into the ballroom to make their annoucment, leaving the girls looking at eachother shocked.

Kim: What was that?

Theresa: I don't know, but we're a gonna find out!

Kim grabs her hand and they race out into the other room...

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

Awwww, it gave me gooseflesh, Theresa! Although you need a fella, too!

Lynn...seriously...must I remind you? Family Forum Award slipping down the drain!

*Kim races down the stairs as Theresa tries to catch up; she accidently bumps into a man and falls to the ground.*

Theresa: Excuse me...

*As she looks up, Theresa stutters, trying to compose herself*

Theresa: You'r--you'--you're...

*The man tips his hat and smiles charmingly at Theresa*

Man: Melody Jones, miss. And you are...?

Theresa: There--Theresa...

*Melody smiles sweetly and extends his hand to help her up*

Melody: It's a pleasure to meet you, miss Theresa--it is miss isn't it?

*Theresa chuckles shyly; and giggles untypably, LOL.* (Meaning I can't type the sound of the strange giggle).

*Meanwhile Kim races down the steps to find Lynn and Dean. Lynn stands at the punch bowl next to Dean, waiting for the band to finish up; Kim pulls Lynn aside*

Kim: What are you thinking?! He's a married man!!

[funnydrunkygal]

LOL! Family?! What kind of family reads this?! Wow! Hehe!

Dean eyes Kim angerliy, he slams down his glass and the punch goes everywhere, Dean puts both arms around Lynn protectly.

Dean: Look here, Miss. I don't mean no disrespect. But, I am divorcing Jeanne, she's been treatin' me like crap anyway, I divorced Betty, I have 7 kids, I DON'T CARE!

Lynn pats Dean's arm, to soothe him.

Lynn: Sweetheart, it's okay, Kim's our friend, remember? It's okay, I love you, I always have and I always will.

Dean calms a bit and places his hand on Kim's arm. Kim pulls away.

Dean: I love you too, Lynn. But, Kim! Listen! All these years I've been waiting and praying that I could marry the woman I've always loved, and now, I finally will. And I'm asking Frank and Mitch to be in the wedding with me. And Clark, they're my best friends.

Mitch, Frank and Clark all raise their glasses.

Mitch: Finally you two lovebirds are gettin' hitched! After 20 years, it's about time, you old lush you!

Mitch slaps his buddy on the back.

Frank: You've been luckier with Lynn, you wop than I've ever been with women......

Clark: Hey, don't be callin' him a wop, he's a great guy.

Dean smiles and hugs each guy.

Dean: You guys are the best, and Gary is too, come ere' pally. I'm lucky I've got you guys, you old chumps.

Gary and the other three crack up, and Dean turns back to Kim.

Lynn smiles at her pally and pinches her cheek,

Lynn: Heey, girly. I want you to be my matron of honor, we're goin' to Vegas, get a divorce from Jeanne, they we're gettin' married, right there. That's the way Dean wants it, and I'm not argurin' with him.

Dean: Yeah, Kimmy. Whattya say?

Dean, Lynn, Theresa, Clark, Gary, Frank and Mitch all look to Kim with hopeful looks.

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

*Kim throws up her hands and laughs*

Kim: Why not?

*Lynn jumps for joy and leaps onto Kim.*

Lynn: Oh thank you, Kimmy, thank you!!

*Dean hesitates...then leaps on Kim and smiles, mockingly*

Dean: Oh thank you, Kimmy, thank you!

*Kim collapses to the ground and glares at Lynn*

Kim: I'll take it all back..

*Lynn bounds up and helps Dean*

Lynn: Oh, don't worry, Kimmy...don't worry pally, we'll behave!

*She helps Kim up and dusts her off*

Lynn: We didn't mean it...

Dean: No, we didn't mean it...

*Kim pushes their arms away and walks to the door*

Kim: Now, I want you all to go to bed! We have a big day of planning tomorrow and we gotta get our sleep.

*Kim closes the door and walks back to her house. A few minutes later she hears a knock on the door; she opens it up to find Gary standing there with a charming smile*

Kim: Hello...

Gary: Are they always that crazy? I've never seen them so wild!

Kim: Lynn brings out the party animal in them.

*They both laugh*

Gary: Well, I was wondering if...well...

Kim: Yes?

Gary: Would you like to take a stroll with me?

Kim: At this hour?!

Gary: If you're busy I can understand; I don't want to--

Kim: Oh, no, I was just going to sleep...that's kinda my daily ritual at 3:30 in the morning, but I wouldn't mind a walk with you...

*He smiles excitedly and takes her by the hand. She smiles and closes her door, grabbing his hand and walking off into the moonlight*

[butterscotchgreer]

theresa: the pleasure is all mine mr. melody.

melody: please just melody

theresa: well just melody.....you are a handsome fellow at that

melody: well you are a handsome little lady at that

theresa: your just saying that

melody:*he chuckles* i would never do such a thing...never

theresa:well its getting late isnt it?

melody: but when its late, its the most beautuful time of day....didnt you know?

theresa: oh! well than i musnt spoil the best part of your evening

melody: the only way you could possibly spoil my evening is if you werent to be with me.

[funnydrunkygal]

LOL! Good job you girls! You could carry this on with out me if you wanted! Thanks for joinin' me in this romp, you two. I love ya both!

The next day, Dean and Lynn wake up early, about 6, pretty tired from being up all night... They didn't care though, they were so excited!

Lynn sits down next to Dean on a swing on the front porch and they cuddle, watching the people walk by. They have some laughs about certin folks they see, then they see Gary and Kim walking up the walk way.

Lynn: LOOK! She told US to go to bed early and she stayed up ALLLL NIGHT LONG!

Dean: That's okay, we don't like staying up late anyway.

Dean and Lynn jump up just as the two lovebirds walk up the porch stairs.

Dean and Lynn bow and show them to a swing across from theirs.

Dean and Lynn: Howdy, howdy kemosabe! Aso!

Lynn punches Dean's shoulder playfully and woozily almost falls off the side. Dean grabs her just in time.

Dean: Hey! I just proposed to you! I don't wanna loose ya now!

Kim and Gary sit cuddley on the swing.

Dean and Lynn look at eachother.

Lynn: Hey lovebirds! The plane for Vegas leaves at 8:30 tonight, we still need to pack, and figure this wedding out. Thanks to Dean, we won't be paying much. I don't like money anyway. I love Dean, only Dean, no money is involved. I've always loved him more than anything..

The two share a sweet kiss and they both light up Camels. Dean takes a few puffs and starts to talk.

Dean: Okay. You both are comin, Mitch, Clark, Frankie, Sammy, Duke, Mr Hope, all my dear friends. Thresa of course will be in the cermony hopefully Paula too, with Gina, my daughter as the flower girl. Craig is gonna give Lynn away to me at the alter, the ring bearer will be Ricci. Claudia, Gail and Deana will be the bridesemaids, and Dino is just gonna tag along with me. All the kids wanna be part of it, they've always loved Lynn like a second mother, and Lynn loves them too.

Dean clears his throat and takes a sip of coffee, and another puff.

Dean: The divorce papers are waiting with Jeanne in Vegas, she signed em', now I need to we'll wait a bit there, stay at the Sands, live it up a bit, relax, then the big day will come...

Dino and Lynn look lovelgly at eachother and kiss eachother.

[*~Mrs. Cooper ~*]

Kim: Sounds like a plan, Lynn...but I only have one question...

Lynn: Yeah? What's that?

Kim: What if Jerry shows up?

*Lynn looks to Dean*

Lynn: I never thought of that...

Dean: He'll just have to leave--there's no room.

Kim: But you've both been through so mu--

Dean: *Sharply* No, I don't want him there.

Kim: All right, if that's the way you want it...

*That night all six board the plane and head off to Vegas; Lynn and Dean share a row, Theresa and Melody share one, as well as Kim and Gary.*

Theresa: So, when are the others coming?

Lynn: They'll be along shortly; Dean and I just wanted to invite our immediate friends to get this whole thing planned out perfectly; .

Theresa: Sounds like a good idea! What time is the wedding?

Dean: Tomorrow afternoon--

Kim: Tomorrow afternoon! That's way too soon, Lynn! We couldn't possibly get everything rea--

Lynn: I told you I don't want a big wedding...

*She cuddles up next to Dean and smiles*

Lynn: I just want Dean...

*The four look to each other and shrug*

Kim: Yes ma'am; it's your wedding...

[funnydrunkygal]

Good post, Kimmy! That adds some intruigine! (speeled it wong, solly!) With Jerry ooooooo! This shall be a intresting story!

Kim, Gary, Theresa, Melody, Dean and Lynnie all arrive at The Sands at about 10:30. The flight was fast and relaxing, other than the Jerry and Wedding talks.

Mitch, Frankie, Clark, Tony and Ricky Nelson were all standing by the doorway, and they started to jump up and down when they saw their pallies drive up in a cab.

Lynn pays the cabby is tab and throws in a buck for a tip, after he thanks her profusley, he hops outta the cab and opens up the doors.

Dean screams and goes to hug all his buddies, as does Lynn. She smacks Ricky with a big smooch and Ricky almost faints.

Mitch: Hey Dino, that kid friend of ours is seeming to get cozy with Lynnie.

Dino: Uh oh. Well, Ricky, I know you are our pally, our best freind cozy group, but you keep your hands off my fiance!

Dino laughs and claps his buddy on the back playfully.

Ricky: Oh, you know Lynnie is old enough to be my mom, but you're sure a lucky guy, Dean!

Mitch, Clarkie, Frankie and Tony all squeese Dean real tight and pinch his cheeks.

Tony: He's my best buddy! So are you Lynn! All you coozes are!

Tony rushes in Kim, Gary, Theresa and Melody over.

Clarkie: These squares are too!

Gary: Well how sweet! You guys are gre.....

Lynn interuppts the freinds and points with one hand, with ciggerette, and the other hand flys up to her mouth.

Lynn: Oh my god. Dean, sweetheart, look whos here... We were just talking about him and he shows outta the sky.

Dino wheels around, and his face gets pale as a sheet. Frank grabs Dean's arm.

Frank: Dean, it's Jerry.....

Then Jerry walks up to the bunch, he looks to his shoes and looks up to Lynn.

Jerry: Hi, Lynn.....

He looks to everyone else and nods his hellos.

Kim: Hello Jerry. You staying here too?

Jerry: No.... I'm just here for a coupla'...

Dean interuppts by stepping real close up to Jerry, he get's a inch from his face, with a deathly stare.

Dean: Look here you sonna *censored*, get the *censor* out of here, before you have no knees to support you.

Mitch and Frank walk over and stand next to Dean, Clark, Tony and Ricky all come over and stand around, looking with deathly looks that would make the five men go to action any time their friend wants them to.

Jerry: Nice to see you... Paul.......

Jerry soon disapeers into the dark night....

Inside the hotel, everyone has calmed down but Dean, to make matters worse, Jeanne is in the lobby.

Jeanne marches up to Dean and thrusts the divorce papers at him, she scowls at Lynn and looks away.

Jeanne: Your children are here, everybody. All seven. You can have em', they love your new wife more than me. Good riddence, Martin. I signed mine.

Dean looks her coldy in the eyes, signs the paper and hands it back to Jeanne. She turns to walk out....

Dean: JUST REMEMBER THAT I HAVE LOVED ONLY ONE WOMAN IN MY WHOLE *censored* *censored* LIFE!

She soon disapeers just as fast as Jerry did. Kim pulls Lynn aside.

Kim: Why are you marrying him, Lynn? Why?

Lynn draws heavliy on her ciggy.

Lynn: I love him, Dean loves me, we love eacother more than anything else in the world. And that means alot. I married that spanish bullfighter, it made Dean go into deep depression. He drake heavliy, slept all day. A total mess. Then he married Jeanne, thinking it would ease the pain, I came back in 50', we started seeing eacother, I took care of the kids. I wasn't much better with my mood than Dean was. I wanted to kill myself, so I went back to my forever love. And, finally we're getting together. And whatever you think, Kim. I don't care. I'm marrying him, forever....

With that, Lynn and the crowd dissapeer upstairs to their ajoining rooms, leaving Kim and Gary in the lobby.

*DUN, DUN.*

LOL!

[funnydrunkygal]

...Dean, Lynn, Theresa and the boys clamor into one of the lavis suites, only to find all their friends ready and waiting for a party.

Dean's attitude quickly changed as his friends made him turn back into his normal, fun self. Other than himself, Lynn, Theresa, Melody, Mitch, Frank, Clark, Tony and Ricky there was Mitch's wife and their kids, Frank's three kids, Bob Hope, his wife, Duke Wayne, his wife and his kids, plus Janet Leigh, Doris Day, Debbie Renyolds, Mack, of course, Elvis himself, Mack's wife, Sammy, May Britt and their child, Joey Bishop, Ken Lane and his wife, and one of Dean's very best pallies, Ronnie Reagan and Nancy, plus their children and Greg Garrison. And of course all of Dean's children were there, the kids climbed all over Lynn, crazily, they hadn't seen eachother for about a week, but they acted like they hadn't seen the woman whom they called 'Mamma' for years.

And two men there made Dean very happy, two of Dino's oldest buddies, Skinny D'Amato and Sonny King.

Dean and Lynn just had a marvlous fun time, whoever thought Dino was a loner would have changed their minds if they saw this party. They partied and they partied hard. Lots of dancing, and LOTS of romance btween Dean and Lynn.

Then two more guests came in, Audrey Hepburn and Ava Gardner, Lynn's friends,but Dean loved being with the two girls. They were so much fun. Jane Russell came in as well and things got even crazier. Then things got bad.

Just as Dino and Lynn stood up to thank all their friends for supporting them both for so many years, and all of them being their very best friends which was nothing but the truth... Kim and Gary walked in.... with two people the whole bunch could not stand...

Jerry and Patti Lewis.....

Lynnn dropped her wine onto the white shag carpeting, Audrey fell backwards into Dean's arms, while Dean turned white as a sheet again and quickly lit another camel, and basically everyone's smile and laughs faded very quickly. Ava was cowering behind Ricky, but the girls and Lynn stepped right up to Jerry and Patti.....

Lynn: I would suggest highly you'd spill the beans about WHY you BOTH are here?! ON OUR WEDDING NIGHT!

Dean stepped up, and so did everybody, everyone was wearing dirty looks and had their arms crossed. Nothing was going to stop them from getting their two enemies out of their party.

[butterscotchgreer]

patti: well its a free country isnt it?

lynn: not while im around

jerry: aww come on lynnie

lynn: dont you calol me lynnie

dean stares him down and jerry's face turns red

everyone is standing behind lynn and dean supporting them

patti: you cant just throw us out ya know

lynn: watch me*her face scrunches up with anger*

dean: it's no use, once she makes up her mind, theres no changing it. you had better leave before i kick you out

kim, gary, theresa, melody, and paula look on wondering if something is about to happen.