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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 1:57:01 GMT -5
Megan: *crosses her fingers behind her back*
Jerry: Good Evening Ladies and Jellyspoons!
Longfellow: *hands the music to the band*
Megan: *takes the microphone and stares blankly at the audience*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 2:21:55 GMT -5
*Kim looks to Megan, nervous*
Megan: Uh....I-I-I-I-
Audience: Get off the stage!
Jerry: *Getting angry in his 9 year old tone* Hey! Shut up!
*A little laugh comes from the audience*
*Megan looks to Jerry and then back at the audience*
*She starts tapdancing and accidentally steps on Jerry's foot*
Jerry: Owwwwwwww!! ......Maaaaaaaaaa!
*Jerry leaps into Deeds' arms and Deeds throws him down, dusting himself off*
Deeds: Stay on the floor, pal, I just got this suit pressed
*Jerry walks up to Deeds and sticks his index finger on Deeds' jacket*
Jerry: There...now it's been pressed again.
*The audience goes hysterical*
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 2:26:45 GMT -5
LOL
Longfellow: Are you trying to start something pal?
Jerry: *takes off his huge overcoat to reveal the barrel he's wearing* Maybe I am and maybe I ain't!
Longfellow: *puts up his fists and laughs hysterically at Jerry's outfit* Oh yeah...Put em up!
Jerry: *puts up his fists* I may be skinny, but I'm anemic!
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 2:32:59 GMT -5
Wow, I keep getting Deeds and Longfellow mixed up, lol, people may think there's 5 of us! Longfellow: *Puts up his dukes* I may look like a pushover, but NOBODY presses my suit and gets away with it *Jerry dances around the stage a bit, with quick feet, trying to throw Deeds off the track and get him confused* *He walks right over to Longfellow, acting as if he may punch him, but he lightly presses Longfellow's jacket again and dances around him again, as if to say 'whaddya' gonna do about THAT?'* *Longfellow grabs Jerry's face and pushes him down, so he goes flying into the audience* *Jerry lands near an elderly woman and she shrieks, he jumps up and swats at her* Jerry: Oh shuddup...
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 2:43:23 GMT -5
*Megan and Kim give up their bits and stand there watching*
Jerry: *sits in some ladies lap* Don't let 'im get me!
Longfellow: Get back here! I'm not through with you!
Jerry: *grabs a potatoe and throws it at Longfellow*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 2:47:04 GMT -5
*He ducks and it hits one of the stage lights out*
Longfellow: Ha! Missed!
*Longfellow runs after Jerry and Jerry screams down the hall*
Jerry: Ma!! ...MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
*The girls sit back and laugh hysterical, chasing after the guys*
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 3:03:26 GMT -5
*The curtain closes and the crowd screams "MORE MORE!"*
Stage Manager: This concludes our contest. We'll bring our contestants out one at a time so you can cast your votes. Remember, the winning act wins a vacation to Italy!
*Jerry and Megan hug backstage as well as Kim and Deeds*
Megan: You were great darling!
Longfellow: *kisses you* That was genius!
Jerry: *ahem* I was the one who wrote the script *puckers up*
Longfellow: *pushes Jerry away*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 11:07:13 GMT -5
Longfellow: Well, if I remember correctly, Jerry...it was all ad-lib, so if anyone wrote that script it was--
Kim: *Yanks on Longfellow's collar, pulling him closer to her* Hey...remember? No fighting!
Longfellow: *Looks at Jerry and then to the ground, kicking his foot to the ground* Sorry Jer'...
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 21:10:14 GMT -5
Jerry: Sorry Deeds...*looks at the ground as well*
Megg: None of this, now you two shake hands!
Jerry: *Sticks his hands behind his back*
Longfellow: *sticks his hands behind his back as well*
Kim: C'mon...it isn't gonna kill ya!
Stage Manager: We're not quite sure what this one is titled, so, let's hear it for Mr. Deeds, Mr. Lewis, Miss Megan, and Miss Kim!
*All step out on the stage and the crowd gives us a standing ovation*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 22:15:33 GMT -5
*The four bow and dash off behind the stage*
Kim: Darling, please shake Jerry's hand...you can't ke--
*The audience calls for another appearance*
Stage manager: Get back out there, they want more of you!
*The girls look to each other*
Megan: We didn't really do anything, I mean...we just stood around, why don't the boys step back out...
Stage Manager: No, ma'am...that applause if for you gorgeous gals, I don't think this town's seen any two broads prettier.
*Jerry and Deeds fold their arms, glaring at the girls*
Stage Manager: Well, it isn't like you boys didn't do well...you were fantastic! ...You just don't have the legs or the hair like these girls...
*Kim looks to Megan, and Megan to Kim*
Both: Oh boy!
*They leap onstage and the audience (which mostly consist of men) go wild, throwing their hats up into the air and screaming*
*The girls blow kisses to the crowd*
*The boys calmly walk out and throw the girls over their shoulders and carry them off-stage*
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 22:38:12 GMT -5
Megan: *screams and kicks* PUT ME DOWN!!!!
Jerry: *puts me down and rubs his arms and chest and back where I've kicked hm and punched him* Whycha do that for?
Megan: Oh, stop being jealous!
Kim: Does this mean we've won?
Stage manager: Ladies and Gentleman, we're going to count the ballots and announce the winner later this evening.
Longfellow: You mean we have to wait around?
Jerry: Yeah, but at least they give the acts free dinner! *goes off in search of the food*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 29, 2006 22:06:20 GMT -5
*Deeds walks over and pushes Jerry, nudging him so he goes flying into the buffet of food*
Kim: *Growls* That's it!
*She leaps on Deeds and starts banging on his chest and ripping at his hair*
Deeds: What are you doing?! Get off of me!
Kim: No! Not until you stop with this violence!
Deeds: *Swatting at Kim* You're the one who's attacking ME!
*Megan and Jerry laugh as Kim and Deeds bump into tables and fly into a woman's salad*
Kim: I've had enough of this, you---you--you mule-headed dog!
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Post by Ajax on Oct 29, 2006 22:42:26 GMT -5
Deeds: What did I do? Talk about being violent! Can't we settle this respectably, like adults without all the name calling!?
*Jerry and Megan walk over and seperate the two holding them back from each other*
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 30, 2006 21:13:15 GMT -5
Kim: *Growling* I've tried talking with you, Longfellow Deeds, and you don't listen to a word I say!
Deeds: How am I supposed to listen to you when you're clawing all over me?!
Kim: I wasn't 'clawing all over you' when you and Jerry were fighting about suits, was I?
Deeds: No...but you've been harping on me this whole trip, and I've had enough, see? You better get this through that pretty lil head of yours, that I don't take very kindly to women attacking me in nice restaruants...
Kim: Well, I wouldn't attack you if you would only listen to me!!
*Deeds storms past Megan and Jerry and walks into the lobby*
Megan: *Looking to Kim* Don't you think you were a little harsh on him, I mean, he didn't do anything that badly, Kim...you did kinda freak out on him.
*Kim growls, as if to lunge at Megan, too*
*Jerry leaps in front of Megan and holds out his arms*
Jerry: Don't touch her!
*Kim storms out into the lobby and walks past Deeds in a huff*
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Post by Ajax on Oct 31, 2006 0:35:23 GMT -5
Deeds: *leaves the hotel and walks around the streets, thinking*
*Jerry and Megan walk out into the lobby looking for Kim and Deeds, just missing them*
Jerry: Gee, we lost them!
*Megan looks through the crowd hoping that maybe the two didn't leave and can hear the echo of the stage manager in the "theatre"*
Stage Manager: Ladies and Gentlemen...your attention please! We would like to announce the winner of tonights contest.... Jerry, Megan, Longfellow, and Kim!
Megan: JERRY! DID YOU HEAR THAT WE WON?!?!
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 31, 2006 0:46:00 GMT -5
*Kim enters a bar and sits down on the stool*
Kim: Coke, please.
*A man walks up to Kim and hits on her*
Man: Hiya pretty lady, wanna I should buy you a drinky-poo?
Kim: ...No...thanks.
Man: Awww, come on, sweetie...
*Deeds walks around outside and enters the same bar*
*He notices a strange man is hitting on Kim, so he walks up and socks the man in the kisser as hard as he can*
*The man spins around and hits the ground hard*
Kim: *Leaps on Longfellow* Oh darling, I'm sorry!
*He holds her tight and kisses her passionately*
Longfellow: Awww, no, I'm the one who's sorry darling, let's get back to the contest, all right? We may have to consol Megan and Jerry.
Kim: What for?
Longfellow: For losing...I'm sure they're taking it pretty hard...
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Post by Ajax on Oct 31, 2006 0:53:32 GMT -5
Jerry: What? We Won?! WE WON! *jumps into Megan's arms*
Stage Manager: Are the winners present?
Megan: YES! *runs into the 'theatre' still holding Jerry*
Jerry: *takes the prize certificate and steps up to the microphone* I'd like to thank the academy...*pretends to take out an acceptance speech*
Megan: *grabs the fake acceptance speech, wads it up and tosses it behind us* Thank you so much ladies and gentlemen!
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Post by *~Mrs. Cooper ~* on Oct 31, 2006 1:13:27 GMT -5
*Kim and Deeds walk quiety back to the hotel and into the lobby*
*Megan and Jerry run out and leap on Kim and Longfellow*
Both: WE WON!!!!!!!!! WE WON!!!!!!!!!!
*Kim looks to Longfellow*
Kim: Oh darling, we won!!
Jerry: Whaddya' talkin' "We"? Megan and I won it...
Longfellow: Oh no you don't, we were part of the act, too!
Jerry: Sure, you were part of the act...but you didn't accept it. WE DID.
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